Listener's Trashbag

Editor: Sven Gonzalez

Items from Listeners' Trashbag or any of my other publications may reproduce if you put three of them in a room alone for a few hours. What happens in that room is kind of kinky, so please hook up a webcam and let me know about it, OK? Materials that have originated in the Artic tend to be very cold, but then so do my toes. For searchable archives we suggest you check out the Library of Congress in Washington D.C. You wouldn't believe what they have there! If you are a regular reader of my materials and a source of DX news or cheap booze but have not been sending Christmas cards to me, I despise you and look forward to spitting on your grave. If you have been sending me Christmas cards, as an atheist I still despise you but probably won't bother to spit on your grave.

UNPUBLISHABLE DX NEWS

AZERBAIJAN Radio Dada Gorgud - Update to previous info that this station uses different IDs - R. Azerbaijan Intl or Voice of Azerbaijan - depending on the language. Actually, the choice is based on who wins the monthly chess tournaments between the various language deparments. (DX Culinary Digest)

CHINA Added to the Tuesday program line up on China Radio International is Name That Dialect! Each week a different dialect is featured through song and story. The first listener to e-mail in the name of the correct dialect gets a case of old Radio Beijing calendars. (Phil Candaro) So, they finally used up all the old Radio Peking ones - sg

CZECH REPUBLIC - Radio Prague has announced plans to begin daily Spanish lessons in all language services (except Spanish). As director Jakub Kolar explained, No one wants to learn Czech, but everyone wants to know how to sound good when ordering Mexican food. We think this will be very popular with younger listeners. Anyone want a sauerkraut burrito? (Union of Exiled Ugandan DX Clubs)

EQUATORIAL GUINEA President-For-Life-Or-Until-He-Is-Overthrown Teodoro Obiang announced that effective immediately, this country would go to UTC minus 100 years. He explained, I am tired of this being called a backward country. From this point on, we will be ahead of our time! Where else in 1907 could you go to the store and buy video games and mp3 players? (BBCMS)

FINLAND Radio Finland is looking for a new way to distribute their programming now that they have eliminated shortwave. Their plan to reach North American listeners by automated outbound phone calls to random phone numbers, hasn't worked out so well since few people stay on the line for more than one minute of the thirty minute broadcast. The new service was sponsored by a large grant from Nokia. (Baffin Island DX Club)

GABON Not to be outdone by their tiny neighbor, the Gabonese parliament passed a resolution immediately changing this country's time zone to UTC plus 100 years. Spokesman, The-Less-Than-Honorable Pierre Emboni announced, Let those entrail-eating Equatorial Guineans live in the past! Now everyone will know that Gabon is the land of the futue! (BBCMS)

HUNGARY Radio Budapet - Director of programming Miklos Gero announced that Anything those Czechs can do, we can do better. We will begin daily Swedish lessons in all language services. Who wants to order enchiladas? Listen to us if you want to know how to talk to hot Swedish babes. (Baffin Island DX Club)

INDIA Since 1998, the Broadcast Outsource Center of All India Radio Bangalore has been slowly adding clients. According to recent figures, it is now providing services to over 327 radio stations and networks worldwide. Many of them are using AIR Bangalore to produce their programming 24x7. In the United States, ABC News has just signed an agreement that will outsource all their radio news to AIR Bangalore. Premiere Radio Networks had plans to outsource Rush Limbaugh's program, but were not able to find an Indian announcer with the same size waist line. (DX Suggestion via Ryan Finelli)

PERU Radio Virgen del Carmen, 4886, will be changing its name sometime before July 1st when Carmen gets married. They hope to locate another virgin by the beginning of June. (Association of DXers Without Radios) I guess if they're lucky she'll be named Carmen and they won't have to shell out for new stationery - sg

SYRIA In an attempt to create a better image for their country amoung western listeners, Radio Damascus will begin airing several new comedy series in its daily English broadcasts. Tuesday will feature Fun With IRCs, in which listeners are invited to send in their most unusual uses for IRCS. On Thursday, it's Adventures in Golf, which is actually a cooking show. (via Review of Idaho Potatoes)

UKOGBANI Lots of new programming on the BBC. The World of Millet looks to be especially entertaining. I can hardly wait for the first show next week.(Horace Collar) And people say I don't have a life. - sg

USA VOA officials have confirmed plans to outsource broadcasts in Russian, Ukrainian, Georgian, and Portuguese to the Broadcast Outsource Center in Bangalore. White House spokesman Larry Glass said We have to cut expenses somewhere if we're going to continue cutting taxes for oil companies. (Sven Gonzalez via World of Jammers via Glen Glick via DX Indigestion)

IMPROPER DX NEWS

AMATEUR RADIO - The Treason Net is on daily from 1400-1530 UTC on 14225 USB. Participants include numerous high-ranking Democratic political leaders and members of Al Qaeda. Hilary Clinton serves as moderator for the US based participants and Osama Bin Laden for those elsewhere. Recent discussions included upcoming bills in the US Congress to outlaw apple pie and to require that all Christians face Mecca when praying. (Coulter) You've been overdosing on your medications again, haven't you? - sg

BOLIVIA Radio Virgen de Remedios 3215 is now Radio ex-Virgen de Remedios. No explanation given. (Dan Morgan) Or needed - sg

CHINA What is this Voice of the Straight station on 5050 kHz? Aren't Gay people allowed to listen to it? Will they still send you a QSL if you're bisexual? (Mabel Warner)

COLOMBIA La Voz de Tu Conciencia - This station really freaks me out. They know everything I'm thinking. I promise, I'll stay on my diet. No more cheesecake for me. I'll even return the lady's panties I shoplifed. Just turn off the #$@#% voices in my head!!! (Justin Fisk)

ECUADOR Radio Licuadora has confirmed that they no longer broadcast on shortwave now that the station has purchased a microwave oven. The announcers had used the shortwave transmitter to heat their lunches. (DX Culinary Digest)

CLANDESTINE GRANNY

Radio Free Capitol Hill - A little known provision tucked away in a bill passed by the lame duck Republican Congress in December, 2006 provided $10 million to set up and operate Radio Free Capitol Hill. Programming will include recordings of past shows of Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, and others from their glory days. Also, reairings of President W.'s most eloquent speeches. Station will use Merlin transmitters in England for ECNA and in Vladivostok for WCNA. Also, streaming audio on the Internet. (Swedish DX Commando via my hair stylist)

Voice of the People Who Don't Want to Be Liberated Now broadcasts from 1600 to 2000 UTC on 15535 kHz with one-hour broadcasts in Norwegian, Italian, Arabic (Tunisian dialect), and Navaho. Hopes to add Belizean Creole after confirming that Belizeans don't want to be liberated either. (Clandestine Radio Toaster Collectors) This could be a very profitable franchise - sg.

PIRATE RADIO

North American Pirates - The Boise Daily Gazette recently had a long investigative article looking into allegations that Vice President Dick Cheney is behind pirate station The Crooked Man. (via Dillon Hollister)

Scandinavian Weekday Radio 11680 1425 to 1450 with sound of someone typing on a computer keyboard. Telephone rang at 1435. They went for a coffee break at 1450, so I figured it was time to tune out. What a bore! (Jack Mann via DX Dieters' Digest via Jack Mann)

PUBLICATIONS

The February 2007 issue of Gospel Huckster magazine had an interview with Ravishu Nayar, head of Evangelical Broadcasting at the Broadcast Outsource Center of All India Radio Bangalore. Ravishu says he has saved over 1,200 souls through his preachings and raised over $900,000 for his program sponsors. His Reverend Mike Frost persona is the most effective. However, Ravishu says he really enjoys being Pastor Billy Bender, because then I can be a real loonie. Bender is Ravishu's own creation and is a cross of Dr. Gene Scott, Liberace, and Bill Murray (my favorite American actor). Ravishu is a Hindu himself, but says he has gained a greater appreciation for Conservative Evangelical Christianity through his work. My ultimate career goal, he says, is to be like Dr. Gene Scott and marry a stripper. (via Boris Barrios)